The delivery of groceries

A low blood sugar level. Who doesn’t enjoy them. Especially if you menstruate and need even more food, AND the fact that in this particular phase the chances of me having a migraine attack is at its peak. It won’t be exactly helpful that I haven’t eaten enough for the past two days.
Keep in mind the fact that as long as we live at mum’s, everything we do and don’t do has its own time schedule.
That and the fact that EVERYTHING we say can and will be heard by mum who’s in her room, waiting.
Pressure.
Anxiety.
Anger.
Thinking ahead all the time, that’s my specialty, in order to be ready for whatever life throws at me. My thoughts whilst accepting the groceries, lifting everything and carrying it to the kitchen and living room, in no particular order (and since it’s an hour later, I may have forgotten about a few, as everything resulted into a brain fog):
-I need to eat, but that’s no time to eat something.
Run run run filling water bottles taking upstairs, filling cup and drinking because I really don’t want to trigger an attack running downstairs again
-There’s so much food, surely I can eat something. No, there’s exactly two of everything. I don’t want to have a preferential treatment. Im not special. Dates!! There’s dates upstairs. He can’t eat them.
Upstairs. My man is there doing his thing. I can’t afford to be slowed down by him.
Okay nothing for me now.
Run run run Feeling lightheaded. Feeling like I can’t get enough air. Inside out stomach feeling. Oh jeez I really need to eat something, I don’t want to trigger an attack.
Brussels sprouts!! Missed eating the non-cleaned ones.
Non-cleaned…. Oh jeez, all the food we’ve ordered requires quite a bit of preparation and cooking. No ready to eat meals this time..!
Had planned on doing only the freezer- and fridge food which comes in bags Right it’s not that much (it’s always about the same amount……), I can empty a crate as well.
I can do the second crate as well.
How about doing the third as well, because 2 LITERS OF SMOOTHIE AND ONE KILO OF BRUSSEL SPROUTS. I don’t want
pressure
so I can still choose to do the crates NOW instead of HAVING to do them later on.
Kind of regret that though.. Regretted not eating something first BUT
‘something’ would’ve been far too little – I needed a proper meal. Or 20 dates and both would take too much time.